transracial adoption support groups

Preparing: Adoption Microaggressions… Lucky Me?

March Pro-Tip to Foster Conversations About Transracial Adoptions

At TRJ we send our families conversation cues each month, from our TRJ card deck, given to all our families at Family Camp. The card deck contains three cards for each month, designed for the children to ask their parents. Below are the questions for March. Before letting your child get started, prepare by reading the parent pro-tip, from the Parent Guide, each month.

March Pro-Tip for Parents: Make sure you have thought about specific times when moments of intrusion or inquiry have happened to your family. Think about the conversations you have had with friends and extended family when they were reflecting on how they feel or think you and your children should feel about adoption. These are intricate and complicated realities and thinking about them and talking about them will help ease what often lives under the surface.

CARD ONE: IDENTITY
• Do you feel lucky to be my parent?
• Do you think I should feel lucky to be your child?

CARD TWO: RELATIONSHIPS
• How do you explain our family to friends and family? How about to strangers that ask about us?

CARD THREE: EMBRACING AND FACING DIFFERENCES OF RACE AND CULTURE
• What are some unlucky things about adoption?

2025 Family Camp Theme Announcement:

A Message from the TRJ Board of Directors and Executive Director

At the intersection of Black History Month and a month when we celebrate love, we are reminded of the power of community, resilience, and the bonds that sustain us on our journeys. This year, those values feel more urgent than ever and why we are thrilled to announce our 2025 camp theme: Together on the Journey: Community, Empowerment, & Joy.

These words embody the heart of our mission—bringing transracially adopted children and their families together in a space of connection, learning, and growth. Each year, TRJ works to create a place where no one walks alone, where identity is celebrated, and where love is the foundation of everything we do.

It may feel like camp is a long way off, but it will be here before we know it! We are already preparing to welcome you back to Ohio University, where laughter will fill the air, friendships will deepen, and meaningful conversations will take place. Registration will open in March and we cannot wait to see both familiar and new faces join us on this incredible journey. As always, our theme will come to life with the help of our amazing Camp Co-Directors Mary and Karen along with our counselors, presenters and special guests.

Honoring Black history helps us celebrate the children entrusted to us through adoption and helps ensure a strong future. Doing this requires deep work to understand racial identity and belonging within a world that does not see the complexities of family separation and trauma. By committing to this work, we ensure that transracially adopted children are protected, seen, and valued for all that they are.

When we commit to this lifelong journey, we create the conditions for children to grow with confidence, cultural pride, and an unshakable sense of belonging. No matter how cold the climate may feel outside, TRJ is here to wrap you in warmth, understanding, and the unshakable knowledge that together the journey can be better and brighter.

We look forward to walking this journey with you. More on camp very soon! Until then, save the dates - July 30th- August 3rd.

Together, we’ll grow.

Together, we’ll heal.

Together, we’ll thrive.

With Love,
The TRJ Board of Directors & Executive Director

January: Honoring Family Connections Through the Calendar

By April Dinwoodie

I couldn’t sleep. Something was nagging at me. Yes, there were work deadlines looming and the mundane tasks of life left undone. But this was different—a heavier weight, a quiet ache pressing on my spirit that I couldn't quite name. I lay awake, restless, cataloging every possible reason for my sadness. No upcoming anniversaries or events came to mind, nothing obvious to explain this depth of melancholy. Eventually, exhausted, I drifted off in the early hours, only to wake feeling spent and blurry-eyed.

As I scrolled through social media that morning, there it was. The anniversary of my mother of origin’s passing. In that moment, I was reminded of how the body keeps the score and how social media can actually help get an adopted person in sync with family of origin after years of separation.

I had only been in reunion for a few years and had yet to fully sync my calendar with the significant dates connected to my family of origin. While I hadn’t committed the exact dates of my relatives’ births and deaths to functional memory, my body and spirit knew. They remembered. The grief lived there, even when my mind hadn’t caught up. I wept reading the heartfelt tributes others shared about my mother of origin—words of love, loss, and remembrance. I wept because I missed her too, trying to hold onto her memory while also letting her go, all within the same breath.

In that raw moment, I needed grounding. I called my mom—the one who raised me. As we talked, I shared how restless my night had been, how my heart felt unsettled. Before I could explain, she interrupted to share that she hadn’t slept well either. I was struck once again by nature and nurture—and how deeply connected I am to both the mother I was born to and the one who raised me.

I share this personal experience because it’s important that parents today hear how deeply integrated and connected adopted persons can be with family of origin even across generations and even when they are not in relationship with them. While adopted persons are embedded into families through adoption they can never be fully disconnected from the families they are born to and the ones with whom they share genetics and intergenerational imprints.

The start of a new year offers us a powerful opportunity—to reimagine the calendar as more than a tool for appointments and to-do lists. For those connected in adoption, the calendar holds profound layers. It can serve as a mirror, reflecting both joy and pain, celebration and loss, connection and separation. It invites us to honor the fullness of our experiences, the both/and of life.

In adoption, the milestones we mark—and those we overlook—shape our realities and our memories. Beyond traditional holidays and birthdays, there are deeper dates to consider: placement anniversaries, court dates, family reunions, and days inflicted with violence and/or deep pain. Some dates are joyous, others carry grief. And often, those emotions coexist.

As we step into a new year, I encourage families—especially those navigating adoption and cultural differences—to curate their calendars with intention. Here are some ways to do that:

Tips for Parents: Honoring Complexity

Intentionally Integrate Adoption into the Calendar: Take time to consider what information about a child’s family of origin you have access to. Reflect on whether you have the context for significant dates that may be emotionally difficult for the child entrusted to you. Find balanced and thoughtful ways to ask questions of family of origin. If there is little or no information or contact, consider reaching out to the professionals who facilitated the adoption to see what more they can uncover. If those professionals cannot be engaged, explore other ways to gain knowledge. Gathering as much factual information as possible helps create a fuller picture of a child's life before they were with you.
Create Space for Reflection and Grief: Acknowledge that some dates might be bittersweet, or emotionally complex. First you need to identify and process your feelings and emotions in order to get grounded to help make this healing space for the children entrusted to you.
Stay Attuned to Unspoken Grief: Sometimes, children feel emotional around significant dates without fully understanding why. Hold space for those feelings and validate them without needing an explanation. Also, helping children to name the complexity and find language for the layered feelings early on can be transformational.
Mark Significant Dates Beyond the Obvious: Include adoption milestones, biological family birthdays and anniversaries, and personal reflection days. Allow space to honor both joy and complexity.

In addition to leveraging the calendar to be proactive in holding space for complexity, we can also use the calendar to explore cultural heritage. Opening space to integrate new elements of celebration and commemoration can expand your family’s relationship with the calendar and with one another. Being culturally curious and authentically interested in a child’s heritage and leading the way with joy will show children you are genuine in your interest in things that are connected to them.

Tips for Parents: Honoring Cultural Heritage

Embrace Cultural Celebrations Together: Explore holidays from a child's culture of origin and celebrate them as a family. Use these moments as teaching opportunities while centering cultural connections.
Share Stories Behind the Dates: When observing special days, share the stories behind them. Help your child understand both the history and emotional layers connected to these moments.
Personalize Family Traditions: Blend traditions from both birth and adoptive families to create meaningful, inclusive rituals that honor the fullness of your child’s identity.
Revisit and Evolve the Calendar Annually: As children grow, their understanding of identity and belonging shifts. Keep an open dialogue about which dates feel important and be willing to adjust.

The calendar can be a profound tool for healing, learning, and connecting. It reminds us that a lot of things can be true at the same time—joy and loss, gratitude and longing, belonging and searching. As we enter this new year, may we all find ways to honor the fullness of our experiences, making space for all of our many layers of our lives.

January Embracing: Live with Authenticity, Purpose and Joy

January is a time when folks traditionally take stock of where they are and may even make some resolutions for a new diet, more time exercising, or commitments to spending quality time with family and friends. For families that extend through transracial adoption, January can offer a time to think about the year ahead and together as a family, continue the expansive journey of authentically navigating family and differences together with purpose and joy.

Related article for parents' reflection: January: Honoring Family Connections Through the Calendar

TRJ Conversation Cards

Our Executive Director, April Dinwoodie, has created conversation cards that help families make space for ongoing conversations about adoption and differences of race and culture. The Transracial Journeys card deck contains 3 cards for each month that the children use to ask their parents questions, that parents can use for quiet reflection. Some families leave the deck somewhere visible and pick a card at random, some families follow the monthly prompts. No matter how you use your cards, you’ll find a pathway to a more active and authentic holding of the complexities of transracial adoption so you and your family can live with authenticity, purpose, and joy. Below are the questions for January. Before getting started, read the parent tip. Families that attend our annual camp receive a set of the cards and if you’d like a set please email info@transracialjourneys.org.

January Tips for Parents: Do some pre-planning so that you have time to process some of the harder anniversaries or days on the calendar before discussing with children. Have some ideas to share for new dates to mark on the calendar so your children can react and be inspired to think about what they’d like to add as well.

CARD ONE: Identifying with the calendar as individuals and as a family

What are your most and least favorite holidays and why?
What are some of your most and least favorite times of year and why?
Are there holidays that you’d rather not acknowledge but feel you have to?

CARD TWO: Relationships

What are ways you can celebrate the happiest days of the year?
How can you honor the saddest days and find ways to prepare for what might be hard?

CARD THREE: Embracing and Facing Differences of Race and Culture

What are some holidays that you have not traditionally celebrated that you could add to the calendar?
What do you need to know about any new holidays that you might add to the calendar?

Kimble Bells: A Celebration of Generosity

A big thank you to Board Chair Kurt Harvey for his passion and persistence in securing TRJ as the 2025 Kimble Bells Charity and Networking Event honoree. Held in Detroit, the event brought together local business leaders for a night of connection and giving. Thanks to the incredible generosity of attendees and a donation match from Freshbank Partners (co-founded by Kurt and his business partner Therese), an astonishing $19,722 was raised.

End-of-Year Giving: Help Us Continue the Journey

As we look to 2024, we invite you to continue supporting Transracial Journeys in our mission. Year-end donations provide essential resources for programming, education, and advocacy for transracial families. Whether you attended Kimble Bells or simply believe in the power of our work, every contribution helps us create more inclusive, understanding communities.

Visit our donation page to make your year-end gift today. Together, we can make this season one of hope, joy, and belonging for all families.

From all of us at TRJ, happy holidays and a joyful and healthy new year!

November Nourishment: Sustaining Strong and Healthy Families

Thanksgiving can be one of the more complicated historical holidays, and for many in the United States, one of the more family and food-centric holidays. Whether you are a family that chooses not to mark Thanksgiving in a traditional way, or your family goes all out with a big Thanksgiving celebration, this month we are thinking about the family table and what might be true when there are differences of race and culture with transracial adoption. November also brings National Adoption Awareness Month, (NAAM) which can be challenging for some adopted persons. This month prompts on your activity deck include questions for both areas of discussion.

November Tip to Foster Conversations About Transracial Adoption

At Transracial Journeys we send out cues for conversations each month. Our Transracial Journeys card deck contains 3 cards for each month that the children use to ask their parents questions. Below are the questions for November. Before getting started, read the parent pro-tip each month.

November Tip for Parents: Talking about family and complicated history can activate deep-seated emotions and feelings. Make sure you have the support you need to process your feelings before and after the conversations you may have with your children.

CARD ONE: IDENTITY
The Family Table: Describe your family table when you were growing up. What was the food like? Who was around the table? What were the best parts of family dinner-time? What were some of the harder parts?
NAAM: When did you first learn of NAAM?

CARD TWO: RELATIONSHIPS
The Family Table: Who were the people sitting around your family table?
NAAM: What does NAAM mean to you?

CARD THREE: EMBRACING AND FACING DIFFERENCES OF RACE AND CULTURE
The Family Table: Were there ever people of different races around your family table?
NAAM: How can we find our own unique ways to honor and mark NAAM?

Navigating: Moving Through Life with Clarity and Confidence

In September we focus on navigating to move through life with clarity and confidence as it can relate to our family's relationship to the calendar. As we make our way through the year there are so many ways we can use the calendar to lean into conversations about the uniqueness of our families. Being thoughtful about how our families have to navigate the world differently and talking openly about what we might face can help ease the impact.

The calendar is the perfect tool to:
• Celebrate the special moments and prepare for the harder ones.
• Honor every person in the family who is connected to your child and to you.
• Ensure you are making time each month to talk with intention about adoption and differences of race, culture, and class.

September Pro-Tip to Foster Conversations About Transracial Adoptions

At Transracial Journeys we send our families conversation cues each month, from our Transracial Journeys card deck, given to all our families at Family Camp and available for purchase. The card deck contains three cards for each month, designed for the children to ask their parents. Below are the questions for September. Before letting your child get started, prepare by reading the parent pro-tip, from the Parent Guide, each month.

September Pro-Tip for Parents: It’s a good idea to add the birthday of your child’s family of origin. If you do not know the dates make an effort to find out and if that is not possible, pick a day where you will honor them in some way and start to institutionalize that on your calendars every year. This will make space to honor those that came before you and while birth parents may not be physically present every day they remain attached to your child and your family in spirit. Make plans to have special treats on these days to celebrate the people that are connected to your children and to you.

Get more guidance on how to use these cards to encourage conversations with your child(ren) while preparing for your own thoughts and emotions related to each topic in our post: Where Did the Calendar Come From?

This post is from our September 2023, e-newsletter. If you would like to get our newsletter in your inbox each month, please subscribe. You will get invitations to our Parent Meet-Up each month, a virtual meeting to act as a transracial adoption support group - sharing issues, ideas and strategies for creating a culture of communication and curiosity in your home, as well as monthly card prompt to keep the conversations about race, adoption, family, love and relationships front and center all year long. And lastly, you'll always be made aware of important dates for Transracial Journeys Family Camp!

August is for Growth: Always Learning and Growing

August Pro-Tip to Foster Conversations About Transracial Adoptions

Transracial Journeys invites your family to experience the calendar in a whole new way. With the help of the June-in-April Calendar Conversation Cards, each month your family is invited to use the cards as a tool for more regular and intentional conversations about identity, family relationships, and differences of race and culture.

Each month has four cards with conversation starters. The prompts and questions are designed to spark reflection and ongoing dialogue within your family as well as with extended family and friends. There is no prescriptive way to use the cards, sometimes parents or grown-ups can take the lead and ask the questions and other times, children can go first.

August Pro-Tip for Parents: Back to school is a time of transition for children and families. It’s a time to be thoughtful about what children need when they go into schools every day. A great way to prepare children from families that don’t match is by having intentional conversations about differences of race and ethnicity as well as family structure and culture.

CARD ONE: IDENTITY (child asking adult)
Close your eyes and think of being a kid at school: What is the first word that comes to mind?
• Can you describe what your school was like?
- How big was it?
- How many other kids were there?
• What was your favorite subject?

CARD TWO: RELATIONSHIPS (child asking adult)
• Who were some of your favorite teachers and why?
• Were there any kids or teachers who looked like me in your school?
• Were there any kids or teachers that were a different race than you?

CARD THREE: EMBRACING AND FACING DIFFERENCES OF RACE AND CULTURE (child asking adult)
• Did you ever see black or brown students being treated differently?
• How do you think your experiences in school were different from mine?
• What can you do better to prepare me for what I might face at school?

This post is from our August 2023, e-newsletter. If you would like to get our newsletter in your inbox each month, please subscribe. You will get invitations to our Parent Meet-Up each month, a virtual meeting to act as a transracial adoption support group - sharing issues, ideas and strategies for creating a culture of communication and curiosity in your home, as well as monthly card prompt to keep the conversations about race, adoption, family, love and relationships front and center all year long. And lastly, you'll always be made aware of important dates for Transracial Journeys Family Camp!

June Fathers’ Day: Claiming Family Realities

June Pro-Tip to Foster Conversations About Transracial Adoptions

At Transracial Journeys we send our families conversation cues each month, from our Transracial Journeys card deck. The card deck contains three cards for each month, designed for the children to ask their parents. Below are the questions for June. Before letting your child get started, prepare by reading the parent pro-tip, from the Parent Guide, each month.

June Pro-Tip for Parents: As with May it is important to spend some time reflecting on how you hold Fathers’ Day for yourself and how you might be better equipped to hold your child/children as they experience their own version of the holiday. Best to have planned time for conversation with trusted loved ones and/or community members before, during, and after your family conversations.

This post is from our June, 2023, e-newsletter. If you would like to get our newsletter in your inbox each month, please subscribe. You will get invitations to our Parent Meet-Up each month, a virtual meeting to act as a transracial adoption support group - sharing issues, ideas and strategies for creating a culture of communication and curiosity in your home, as well as monthly card prompt to keep the conversations about race, adoption, family, love and relationships front and center all year long. And lastly, you'll always be made aware of important dates for Transracial Journeys Family Camp.

Mothers’ Day: Claiming Family Realities

May Pro-Tip to Foster Conversations About Transracial Adoptions

At Transracial Journeys we send our families conversation cues each month, from our Transracial Journeys card deck. The card deck contains three cards for each month, designed for the children to ask their parents. Below are the questions for May. Before letting your child get started, prepare by reading the parent pro-tip, from the Parent Guide, each month.

May Pro-Tip for Parents: : Be sure to build in time for you and your child to process all of the feelings that may come about surrounding Mothers’ Day. Resist the urge to expect gifts and instead give yourself something special to honor yourself as a mother or mother figure. Be prepared to help your child hold the both/and of this holiday.

This post is from our May, 2023, e-newsletter. If you would like to get our newsletter in your inbox each month, please subscribe. You will get invitations to our Parent Meet-Up each month, a virtual meeting to act as a transracial adoption support group - sharing issues, ideas and strategies for creating a culture of communication and curiosity in your home, as well as monthly card prompt to keep the conversations about race, adoption, family, love and relationships front and center all year long. And lastly, you'll always be made aware of important dates for Transracial Journeys Family Camp - registration is open now!

Being Prepared as a Transracial Family