Book Corner – June 2025

Baby's First Words

by Stella Blackstone & Sunny Scribens
illustrated by Christiane Engel
Board Book

Dad and baby have a great day together in this colorful board book. When a baby’s other dad comes home, it’s time for a bubble bath and a cozy tuck-in. Young children will enjoy learning new words as they spend the day with this happy family.

Related Articles About the Roles of Mothers and Fathers


Celebrating the Many Hands and Hearts That Hold Us: Part Two — Honoring Fatherhood in Its Many Forms

By April Dinwoodie

This spring, we're offering a two-part series:
Celebrating the Many Hands and Hearts That Hold Us — an exploration of what it means to honor family expansively through the lens of adoption.

As an adopted person — and someone in deep community with others who share this experience — I know firsthand that Father’s Day can be powerful, complicated, and deeply emotional. (read Part One about Mother's Day)

Some years, it filled me with gratitude. Other years, there was a quiet ache — wondering about the man who gave me life and the life I might have had. Even as I loved the father who raised me, there was still a part of me reaching for something... or someone... just out of reach.

That layered experience is not unique to me. It’s woven into the lives of many adopted persons. And no matter how we may feel, the reminders will come — through store displays, school assignments, social media tributes, and advertising campaigns.

In Part Two of our series, we focus on Father’s Day — the emotions it carries, the opportunities it presents, and how adoptive families can hold space for the many hands and hearts that shape a child’s life.

Fathers Day for Adoptive fathers

Fathering in Many Forms

For many of us, the word father is layered — and when adoption is part of the story, those layers deepen.

There may be a father of origin whose presence or absence shaped the beginning of a child’s life. There may be a father who raises and nurtures daily. There may be foster dads, grandfathers, mentors, coaches — and even aunties or mothers — who bring fathering energy in ways large and small.

Parenting a child through adoption means embracing the truth of multiple fathering experiences. It means helping children hold both love and grief, gratitude and longing, knowns and unknowns — often all at once.

Father’s Day can be joyful and confusing. It can be a time of celebration and sorrow. And when adoptive parents acknowledge these truths with openness, they offer one of the most powerful gifts: Permission and pathways to be whole.

The Erasure of Fathers — Especially Black Fathers

The truth is: many fathers of origin were not absent — they were excluded. They were pushed out of the narrative or never brought into it to begin with. Some — like my own — didn’t even know we existed.

There are, of course, cases where exclusion is necessary. When a father poses a risk to the child or others, safety must come first. And in adoption, it is often mothers who are positioned — sometimes solely — to decide whether or not to engage fathers. These are deeply personal, emotional, and often complicated decisions.

But far too often, exclusion becomes the default — not because of safety, but because of stigma, assumptions, or systemic failures. And when that happens, children lose access to an important part of their identity.

This erasure is especially common when it comes to Black fathers, who have long been portrayed through distorted, deficit-based lenses — as disengaged, irresponsible, or disposable. These narratives are not just untrue — they are deeply harmful.

We can do better.

Even when direct contact isn’t possible or appropriate, we can make space for dialogue, curiosity, and connection — symbolically, emotionally, historically. We can speak of fathers of origin with humanity and cultural humility. We can, invite in their presence, even if only through stories, reflection, or ritual.

In doing so, we honor the whole child — and the many hands and hearts that helped bring them into this world.

Suggestions for a More Expansive Fathers’ Day

Here are a few ways to expand and deepen your family’s celebration of fatherhood:

1. Name and Honor All Father Figures

Just like we did for Mothers’ Day, take time to name the people who have offered fathering care: fathers of origin, grandfathers, foster dads, coaches, uncles, mentors — even moms or aunties who carry fathering energy.

Speak them into the space.
Example: “I wonder what your father of origin might have been like. I wonder if he liked being outside like you do.”

This act of wondering and naming makes room for reflection, memory, and humanizing fathers.

2. Challenge the Single-Story Narrative

If you're parenting a child through adoption, challenge the idea that one father replaces another. You don’t need to choose between the past and present. Embrace the both/and:
“I’m so honored I get to raise you, and I wonder what parts of your father of origin live in you.”

Honoring one does not diminish the other.

3. Create a Ritual or Symbolic Gesture

Even if the child entrusted to you has no relationship with or knowledge of their father of origin, you can still make space for connection.
Rituals can help hold what is unknown or unresolved.

Plant something. Light a candle. Add a note to a memory box. Include a name or likeness (if known) in a family collage. These small acts of remembrance say:
“All of who you are matters here.”

4. Talk to Schools and Communities Ahead of Time

Just like with Mother’s Day, reach out to the adults in your child’s life — teachers, coaches, clergy — and offer context.

Explain your family’s approach to Father’s Day. Ask them to be mindful of activities that assume a singular, present, or traditional father figure.

It’s not about avoiding the holiday — it’s about preparing for it with intention and care.

Becoming the Bridge

As adoptive parents and caregivers, you are not meant to erase what came before — you are meant to build a bridge to it.

This Father’s Day, honor the many hands and hearts that hold your child. Include your own. Don’t be afraid of complexity — it’s where truth lives.

Traditional celebrations may not always fit your family’s reality — and that’s okay. With open hearts, honest conversations, and a willingness to hold what’s hard, your family can meet this season with connection and grace.

When we honor fatherhood in its many forms, we give our children something powerful:
the right to know themselves fully — and to be loved in all their layers.

Listen to the Calendar Conversations podcast to hear more about this series.  And follow April on social media @JuneinApril and on YouTube @April Dinwoodie

Posts Related to Fatherhood, Motherhood and Transracial Adoption

This post is from our June 2025 newsletter. If you would like to get our newsletter in your inbox each month, as well as information about our annual TRJ Family Camp and our monthly Zoom call providing support for our transracial adoption parents, please subscribe.


June Father’s Day: Family Titles, Roles, and Relationships

Officially celebrating Father’s Day came a bit later than Mother’s Day and there are many of the same things to think about and reflect on as we come to this day that is all about acknowledging the fathers and father figures in our lives. In adoption father’s of origin or birth/first fathers are often thought of after mothers. Sometimes there can be even less information about fathers and it can be harder to open up a conversation about the role these men play in the lives of adopted children and as part of the extended family. 

Read last month's post, Mother’s Day: Family Titles, Roles, and Relationships as well as Celebrating the Many Hands and Hearts That Hold Us: Part Two — Honoring Fatherhood in Its Many Forms for more insight on this subject from multiple perspectives.

June Pro-Tip to Foster Conversations About Transracial Adoptions

At Transracial Journeys we send our families conversation cues each month, from our Transracial Journeys card deck. The card deck contains three cards for each month, designed for the children to ask their parents. Below are the questions for June. Before letting your child get started, prepare by reading the parent pro-tip, from the Parent Guide, each month.

June Pro-Tip for Parents: As with May it is important to spend some time reflecting on how you hold Fathers’ Day for yourself and how you might be better equipped to hold your child/children as they experience their own version of the holiday. Best to have planned time for conversation with trusted loved ones and/or community members before, during, and after your family conversations.

CARD ONE: IDENTITY
• How do you identify with Fathers’ Day?
• What are the different feelings you have about Fathers’ Day?

CARD TWO: RELATIONSHIPS
• How do we honor Father’s Day in our family?
• Can we acknowledge and celebrate more than one father?

CARD THREE: EMBRACING AND FACING DIFFERENCES OF RACE AND CULTURE
• Do different cultures celebrate Father’s Day?
• Are there different ways Fathers are honored around the world?

This post is from our June, 2025, e-newsletter. If you would like to get our newsletter in your inbox each month, please subscribe.  You will get invitations to our Parent Meet-Up each month, a virtual meeting to act as a transracial adoption support group - sharing issues, ideas and strategies for creating a culture of communication and curiosity in your home, as well as monthly card prompt to keep the conversations about race, adoption, family, love and relationships front and center all year long.  And lastly, you'll always be made aware of important dates for Transracial Journeys Family Camp.


Mother’s Day: Family Titles, Roles, and Relationships

As a country we have been celebrating Mother’s Day since the 19th century, honoring women who play a pivotal role in the lives of children of any age. For some, Mother’s Day can bring feelings of both celebration and complexity. In adoption, mothers of origin or birth/first mothers play a vital role in the lives of children they are born to and separated from. It’s important that you have open and loving conversations about different ways mothers and mother figures play a vital role in a child’s life.

June-in-April Calendar Conversation Cards

Transracial Journeys invites your family to experience the calendar in a whole new way. With the help of the June-in-April Calendar Conversation Cards, each month your family is invited to use the cards as a tool for more regular and intentional conversations about identity, family relationships, and differences of race and culture.

Each month has four cards with conversation starters. The prompts and questions are designed to spark reflection and ongoing dialogue within your family as well as with extended family and friends. There is no prescriptive way to use the cards, sometimes parents or grown-ups can take the lead and ask the questions and other times, children can go first.

Here is a suggested weekly breakdown for using each set of monthly cards:

Week 1: Parent/caregiver preparation and reflection

• Review the month’s theme and conversation prompts
• Check-in with any emotions that come up and discuss with a partner, friend, or loved one
• Put time on the calendar for the family to engage with the conversation cards

Week 2: Read/discuss card 1
Week 3: Read/discuss card 2
Week 4: Read/discuss card 3 and close out the month with any insights, challenges and new ideas for the next month

Mothers Day

May Pro-Tip for Parents: Be sure to build in time for you and your child to process all of the feelings that may come about surrounding Mothers’ Day. Resist the urge to expect gifts and instead give yourself something special to honor yourself as a mother or mother figure. Be prepared to help your child hold the both/and of this holiday.

CARD ONE: IDENTITY
• What does Mothers' Day mean to you?
• What are some feelings you have about Mothers’ Day?

CARD TWO: RELATIONSHIPS
• How do we honor Mother’s Day in our family?
• Can we acknowledge and celebrate more than one mother?

CARD THREE: EMBRACING AND FACING DIFFERENCES OF RACE AND CULTURE
• Do different cultures celebrate Mother’s Day?
• Are there different ways mothers are honored around the world?

This post is from our May, 2025, email newsletter. If you would like to get our newsletter in your inbox each month, please subscribe.  You will get invitations to our monthly Parent Meet-Ups, a virtual meeting to act as a transracial adoption support group - sharing issues, ideas and strategies for creating a culture of communication and curiosity in your home, as well as monthly card prompt to keep the conversations about race, adoption, family, love and relationships front and center all year long.  And lastly, you'll always be made aware of important dates for Transracial Journeys Family Camp - registration is open now!


Preparing: Adoption Microaggressions… Lucky Me? 

Being Prepared as a Transracial Family

Have you had strangers ask inappropriate questions of you and your family?

  • “Is she/he/them yours?”
  • “Where are they from?” 
  • Your child is SO lucky”.

These invasive questions are part of being a family that does not match and where differences of race are obvious to the world around you. It is important to be prepared for these intrusions.

March Pro-Tip to Foster Conversations About Transracial Adoptions

At TRJ we send our families conversation cues each month, from our TRJ card deck, given to all our families at Family Camp. The card deck contains three cards for each month, designed for the children to ask their parents. Below are the questions for March. Before letting your child get started, prepare by reading the parent pro-tip, from the Parent Guide, each month.

March Pro-Tip for Parents: Make sure you have thought about specific times when moments of intrusion or inquiry have happened to your family. Think about the conversations you have had with friends and extended family when they were reflecting on how they feel or think you and your children should feel about adoption. These are intricate and complicated realities and thinking about them and talking about them will help ease what often lives under the surface.

CARD ONE: IDENTITY
• Do you feel lucky to be my parent?
• Do you think I should feel lucky to be your child?

CARD TWO: RELATIONSHIPS
• How do you explain our family to friends and family? How about to strangers that ask about us?

CARD THREE: EMBRACING AND FACING DIFFERENCES OF RACE AND CULTURE
• What are some unlucky things about adoption?

 

Related Posts and Resources:

March: Changing the Script on Adoption, Luck and Microaggressions

Sharp Edges of Exclusion that Come with Adoption, Family Separation and Differences of Race

Transracial Adoptive Parent Support Group

 

This post is from our March, 2025 e-newsletter.  Pictures on the website are from Family Camp. If you would like to get our newsletter in your inbox each month, with Family Camp updates, please subscribe.  You will get invitations to our Parent Meet-Up each month, a virtual meeting to act as a transracial adoption support group - sharing issues, ideas and strategies for creating a culture of communication and curiosity in your home, as well as monthly card prompt to keep the conversations about race, adoption, family, love and relationships front and center all year long.  And lastly, you'll always be made aware of important dates for our main event;  TRJ Family Camp!


January Embracing: Live with Authenticity, Purpose and Joy

January is a time when folks traditionally take stock of where they are and may even make some resolutions for a new diet, more time exercising, or commitments to spending quality time with family and friends. For families that extend through transracial adoption, January can offer a time to think about the year ahead and together as a family, continue the expansive journey of authentically navigating family and differences together with purpose and joy.

Related article for parents' reflection: January: Honoring Family Connections Through the Calendar

TRJ Conversation Cards

Our Executive Director, April Dinwoodie, has created conversation cards that help families make space for ongoing conversations about adoption and differences of race and culture. The Transracial Journeys card deck contains 3 cards for each month that the children use to ask their parents questions, that parents can use for quiet reflection. Some families leave the deck somewhere visible and pick a card at random, some families follow the monthly prompts. No matter how you use your cards, you’ll find a pathway to a more active and authentic holding of the complexities of transracial adoption so you and your family can live with authenticity, purpose, and joy. Below are the questions for January. Before getting started, read the parent tip. Families that attend our annual camp receive a set of the cards and if you’d like a set please email info@transracialjourneys.org.

January Tips for Parents: Do some pre-planning so that you have time to process some of the harder anniversaries or days on the calendar before discussing with children. Have some ideas to share for new dates to mark on the calendar so your children can react and be inspired to think about what they’d like to add as well.

CARD ONE: Identifying with the calendar as individuals and as a family

  • What are your most and least favorite holidays and why?
  • What are some of your most and least favorite times of year and why?
  • Are there holidays that you’d rather not acknowledge but feel you have to?

CARD TWO: Relationships

  • What are ways you can celebrate the happiest days of the year?
  • How can you honor the saddest days and find ways to prepare for what might be hard?

CARD THREE: Embracing and Facing Differences of Race and Culture

  • What are some holidays that you have not traditionally celebrated that you could add to the calendar?
  • What do you need to know about any new holidays that you might add to the calendar?

This post is from our January, 2025, e-newsletter. If you would like to get our newsletter in your inbox each month, please subscribe.


Kimble Bells: A Celebration of Generosity

Kimble Bells Charity Event Honoree

A big thank you to Board Chair Kurt Harvey for his passion and persistence in securing TRJ as the 2025  Kimble Bells Charity and Networking Event honoree. Held in Detroit, the event brought together local business leaders for a night of connection and giving. Thanks to the incredible generosity of attendees and a donation match from Freshbank Partners (co-founded by Kurt and his business partner Therese), an astonishing $19,722  was raised. 

End-of-Year Giving: Help Us Continue the Journey

As we look to 2024, we invite you to continue supporting Transracial Journeys in our mission. Year-end donations provide essential resources for programming, education, and advocacy for transracial families. Whether you attended Kimble Bells or simply believe in the power of our work, every contribution helps us create more inclusive, understanding communities.

Visit our donation page to make your year-end gift today. Together, we can make this season one of hope, joy, and belonging for all families.

From all of us at TRJ, happy holidays and a joyful and healthy new year!

This post is from our December, 2024, newsletter. If you would like to get our newsletter in your inbox each month, as well as information about our annual Transracial Journeys Family Camp and our monthly Zoom call to provide support for our transracial adoption parents please subscribe.


December – Reflections: Evolving Traditions 

The December holidays give us an opportunity to think about traditions tied to different cultures and religions. Regardless of what you and your family honor and celebrate, we can be inspired to take a closer look at what traditions mean to us and how we can expand our thinking and actions.

Read this month's reflection and link to book gift giving guide as well as previous December posts from over the years to help guide you and your family through the ideas of evolving traditions:

December Pro-Tip to Foster Conversations About Transracial Adoptions

At Transracial Journeys we send out cues for conversations each month. Our Transracial Journeys card deck contains 3 cards for each month that the children use to ask their parents questions. Below are the questions for December. Before getting started, read the parent pro-tip each month.

December Pro-Tip for Parents: Resist the urge to hold tight onto traditions that may be holding you back from fully embracing new ideas that may better honor your child’s culture. Also think about simplifying or modifying some of the traditions you now honor to make room for new ones.

CARD ONE: IDENTITY
• As a kid, did you celebrate any December holidays?
• If so, which ones?

CARD TWO: RELATIONSHIPS
• Were there things that you would do year after year as a family during the month of December or maybe other months of the year?

CARD THREE: EMBRACING AND FACING DIFFERENCES OF RACE AND CULTURE
• What are some new traditions or holidays you’d like to learn more about and/or try?

This post is from our December, 2024, e-newsletter. If you would like to get our newsletter in your inbox each month, please subscribe.


August – Growing: Always Learning

Back to school is a time of transition for children and families. It’s a time to be thoughtful about what children need when they go into schools every day. A great way to prepare children from families that don’t match is by having intentional conversations about differences of race and ethnicity as well as family structure and culture. Read "Back-to-School," this month's reflection by K. Bean, for more on intentional conversations about adoption and race during this time of year.

August Pro-Tip to Foster Conversations About Transracial Adoptions

Transracial Journeys invites your family to experience the calendar in a whole new way. With the help of the June-in-April Calendar Conversation Cards, each month your family is invited to use the cards as a tool for more regular and intentional conversations about identity, family relationships, and differences of race and culture.

Each month has four cards with conversation starters. The prompts and questions are designed to spark reflection and ongoing dialogue within your family as well as with extended family and friends. There is no prescriptive way to use the cards, sometimes parents or grown-ups can take the lead and ask the questions and other times, children can go first.

August Pro-Tip for Parents: Back to school is a time of transition for children and families. It’s a time to be thoughtful about what children need when they go into schools every day. A great way to prepare children from families that don’t match is by having intentional conversations about differences of race and ethnicity as well as family structure and culture.

CARD ONE: IDENTITY 
Close your eyes and think of being a kid at school: What is the first word that comes to mind?
• Can you describe what your school was like?
- How big was it?
- How many other kids were there?
• What was your favorite subject?

CARD TWO: RELATIONSHIPS
• Who were some of your favorite teachers and why?
• Were there any kids or teachers who looked like me in your school?
• Were there any kids or teachers that were a different race than you?

CARD THREE: EMBRACING AND FACING DIFFERENCES OF RACE AND CULTURE
• Did you ever see black or brown students being treated differently?
• How do you think your experiences in school were different from mine?
• What can you do better to prepare me for what I might face at school?

This post is from our August 2024 newsletter. If you would like to get our newsletter in your inbox each month, please subscribe.  You will get invitations to our Parent Meet-Up each month, a virtual meeting to act as a transracial adoption support group - sharing issues, ideas and strategies for creating a culture of communication and curiosity in your home, as well as monthly card prompt to keep the conversations about race, adoption, family, love and relationships front and center all year long.  And lastly, you'll always be made aware of important dates for Transracial Journeys Family Camp!


Book Corner – July 2024

By Becca Howe, TRJ Parent

Book Corner – Brooke Randolph: It’s Not About You

Understanding Adoptee Search, Reunion, & Open Adoption

It’s Not About You: Understanding Adoptee Search, Reunion, & Open Adoption is a book written for adoptive and birth parents and their therapists. After repetitive conversations with adopted persons (and sometimes their parents) about reactions to their search and reunion, Brooke knew adoptive and parents of origin needed a book on the topic.  

Brooke is a therapist, author, speaker, trainer and an adoptive parent who enjoys sharing with groups of all sizes whether that is in person or online. Both therapeutically and personally, she is committed to never stop learning and growing. Primary specialties for Brooke include adoption competent therapy, Brainspotting, relationship building, and developmental trauma. Brooke is a certified Imago Relationship Therapist, a Certified Brainspotting Trainer & Consultant, and coordinator for the groups Brainspotting Indy and Brainspotting with Adoption.

This year, we are thrilled to have Brooke joining us at the Transracial Journeys Family Camp to help bring to life parent work sessions  centered on creating a brighter path to inclusivity for transracially adopted persons as well as the extended family.  

https://brooke-randolph.com/author-brooke/